Too much has happened. Too much pain. Too much heartbreak. Not sure which way to go. So all I want to do is hide in my own little world. If I was still going to OU and still was able to retain things, I believe I could finish my degree. I loved my classes at OU. I miss the rushing to the classes and the listening to the lectures, but doing the reading in the books was hell. Reading doesn't help me retain crap. Now if it was in paranormal romance, maybe.
I just try to keep from sinking. I hate this room. Too dark. Not enough light to keep me awake during the day. If my grandson was here, he would wake me up. I have way better luck with him around. Plus, I go to bed earlier when we have to share a room. I miss him. I want him home. I miss hearing, seeing, and playing on the whiteboard with him. He gets a kick out of the whiteboard.
Right now, I am working on learning how to work on doilies. I really shouldn't. I just don't have to heart to finish my grandson's magic carpet. Every little thought makes me cry. Even when I bought Aladdin for him I nearly cried.
His mom left his coat behind. I noticed that it is cold up there. I hope he is warm enough. I worry about him. I just hope he is safe. His mom will not let me see him nor talk to him over the phone. So much I want to say, but I can't.
